Eco-Connect'20
Become a better listener in this time of covid19
Several factors go into communication. Major factors include attitudes and values, conscious and unconscious communication and timing. Who do you think plays a more important role in effective communication, the sender or the receiver.
The types of listening that happens when a listener deliberately chooses what he or she wants to pay attention to.
Actions on the part of the listener can contribute to miscommunication. You will have to find out what makes you a poor listener.
Prejudice in communication is the unwillingness to listen to members of groups the listener believes are inferior, such as other ethnic groups or women. It can also take more subtle forms.
We have an interesting research that drives us for further reading what is known as the:
"Ebbinghaus Curve of Forgetting" or the "Ebbinghaus Curve" developed by Herman Ebbinghaus (1850 - 1909).
The author states that we remember less than half of what we have heard after an hour, about a third after a day, and about one-fourth after a week. ( Cf. H. E. Ebbinghaus, Memory: a Contribution to Experimental Psychology, New York: Dover, 1964).
We can learn how to communicate we in our homes in this time Covid19. Like living in a community, you never choose whom you want to live with but you just have to cope and co-exist in this common home, hook or crook you have to adjust many things including your life to survive or live depending on what you define life to be.
1. Stop talking of what you don't know, get right information first.
2. Get rid of distractions, fake news, whatsaap forwards that don't build one in contemplative action.
3. Try to enter into the speaker's reality. What is s/he saying, don't assume you know what she or wants to say.
4. Use pauses for reflecting, don't be a talking machine.... Listen to what you are saying.
5.Listen for main ideas, not what is in your head
6. Give feedback if necessary not what you think it should have said.
7. Listen for feelings as well as for facts. Don't become a robot or sadistic or stoic.
8. Encourage others to talk, don't monopolise the show. Even the ignorant have something to teach us.
Know know this :
Did you know that pointing the soul of your shoe at someone in an Arab country or in India would be considered insulting?
That in Chinese society it is all right to stare at people? Or that in several cultures, eating with the left hand is considered to be bad manners?
Many people from European and Asian countries value punctuality as much as, or even more than, people from in the United States. In Hong Kong and Tokyo, the trains are famous for always being on time, and people often show up early for appointments rather than risk being late. All this leads us to what we call low-context culture and high-context culture.
Low- context culture :
A culture which a written agreement, such as a contract, can be taken at face value.
High- context culture :
A culture in which social context sorrounding a written document is far more important than the document itself.
One must be very careful about cultural norms, nonverbal behavior on both sides and anything else involving the the overall atmosphere of the communication. All depend on person to person relationship that builds itself into:
Horizontal communication :
Messages that are communicated between you and your equals in the formal organization.
Grapevine:
The network within an organization that communicates incomplete, but usually somewhat accurate information.
Rumour mill:
A gossip network that produces mostly false information ("fake newsers"... My categorization ).
The rumour mill and grapevine are two types of networking you may find in a work environment. What can you learn by joining either network?
Sometimes we may pretend as if we have said nothing yet we have already communicated our stand. As many say, you don't need to make noise in order to be heard.
Nonverbal Signals
- gestures, arm movements
- eye contact, eye movements
- physical appearance, clothing
- space allowed between speaker and listener.
- facial expression.
- touch
These are ways of communicating without speaking, such as gestures, body language and facial expression.
Mixed signals verbal & Nonvetbal
- vocal pacing and pauses
- loudness, vocal quality (timbre)
- pitch of voice
- silence
- confidence in use of vocabulary
Careless in listening.
Both nonverbal signals and mixed signals can tell you more about a speaker's message than the actual words. What should you do when a speaker's verbal message doesn't match his or her nonverbal one?
Filtering works both ways. It reflects what the person decides to say. In communicating to others, be sure that your filtering is appropriate and that you ate not sharing too much or too little.
Filtering is a method where listeners use to hear only what they want to hear, which may result in failing to receive messages correctly.
© Don J. B Nyamunga
Girimori Kericho Kenya (E. A)
Become a better listener in this time of covid19
Several factors go into communication. Major factors include attitudes and values, conscious and unconscious communication and timing. Who do you think plays a more important role in effective communication, the sender or the receiver.
The types of listening that happens when a listener deliberately chooses what he or she wants to pay attention to.
Actions on the part of the listener can contribute to miscommunication. You will have to find out what makes you a poor listener.
Prejudice in communication is the unwillingness to listen to members of groups the listener believes are inferior, such as other ethnic groups or women. It can also take more subtle forms.
We have an interesting research that drives us for further reading what is known as the:
"Ebbinghaus Curve of Forgetting" or the "Ebbinghaus Curve" developed by Herman Ebbinghaus (1850 - 1909).
The author states that we remember less than half of what we have heard after an hour, about a third after a day, and about one-fourth after a week. ( Cf. H. E. Ebbinghaus, Memory: a Contribution to Experimental Psychology, New York: Dover, 1964).
We can learn how to communicate we in our homes in this time Covid19. Like living in a community, you never choose whom you want to live with but you just have to cope and co-exist in this common home, hook or crook you have to adjust many things including your life to survive or live depending on what you define life to be.
1. Stop talking of what you don't know, get right information first.
2. Get rid of distractions, fake news, whatsaap forwards that don't build one in contemplative action.
3. Try to enter into the speaker's reality. What is s/he saying, don't assume you know what she or wants to say.
4. Use pauses for reflecting, don't be a talking machine.... Listen to what you are saying.
5.Listen for main ideas, not what is in your head
6. Give feedback if necessary not what you think it should have said.
7. Listen for feelings as well as for facts. Don't become a robot or sadistic or stoic.
8. Encourage others to talk, don't monopolise the show. Even the ignorant have something to teach us.
Know know this :
Did you know that pointing the soul of your shoe at someone in an Arab country or in India would be considered insulting?
That in Chinese society it is all right to stare at people? Or that in several cultures, eating with the left hand is considered to be bad manners?
Many people from European and Asian countries value punctuality as much as, or even more than, people from in the United States. In Hong Kong and Tokyo, the trains are famous for always being on time, and people often show up early for appointments rather than risk being late. All this leads us to what we call low-context culture and high-context culture.
Low- context culture :
A culture which a written agreement, such as a contract, can be taken at face value.
High- context culture :
A culture in which social context sorrounding a written document is far more important than the document itself.
One must be very careful about cultural norms, nonverbal behavior on both sides and anything else involving the the overall atmosphere of the communication. All depend on person to person relationship that builds itself into:
Horizontal communication :
Messages that are communicated between you and your equals in the formal organization.
Grapevine:
The network within an organization that communicates incomplete, but usually somewhat accurate information.
Rumour mill:
A gossip network that produces mostly false information ("fake newsers"... My categorization ).
The rumour mill and grapevine are two types of networking you may find in a work environment. What can you learn by joining either network?
Sometimes we may pretend as if we have said nothing yet we have already communicated our stand. As many say, you don't need to make noise in order to be heard.
Nonverbal Signals
- gestures, arm movements
- eye contact, eye movements
- physical appearance, clothing
- space allowed between speaker and listener.
- facial expression.
- touch
These are ways of communicating without speaking, such as gestures, body language and facial expression.
Mixed signals verbal & Nonvetbal
- vocal pacing and pauses
- loudness, vocal quality (timbre)
- pitch of voice
- silence
- confidence in use of vocabulary
Careless in listening.
Both nonverbal signals and mixed signals can tell you more about a speaker's message than the actual words. What should you do when a speaker's verbal message doesn't match his or her nonverbal one?
Filtering works both ways. It reflects what the person decides to say. In communicating to others, be sure that your filtering is appropriate and that you ate not sharing too much or too little.
Filtering is a method where listeners use to hear only what they want to hear, which may result in failing to receive messages correctly.
© Don J. B Nyamunga
Girimori Kericho Kenya (E. A)
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