ADVENT- A TIME TO LEARN HOW TO WAIT

Advent is a season with four weeks which prepare for Christmas and form the beginning of the liturgical year. They are characterized by the curtailing of festivities: no Gloria is said (Except on Feast of Immaculate Conception) and the liturgical colour is penitential violet (except for the third Sunday of Advent, when roses may be used). “Advent” also refers to Christ’s “second coming” at the end of history.

“When these things begin to take place, stand erect, hold your heads high, because your liberation is near at hand” (Luke 21:28)

Carlo Carretto, a renowned spiritual writer, spent years of living alone as a hermit in the Sahara desert. He spent his years of solitude in writing. In all these he wrote a letter to people like us who are very busy living in the world. What is God trying to say to us in our busy lives? He suggests this:

“Be patient! Learn to wait for each other, for love, for happiness, for God. Learn to wait! That is not something we can do easily and many of our problems flow from that. We often don’t wait properly for things. Anne Dillard shares this story about proper waiting. She watched a butterfly emerge from a cocoon and was fascinated by the process until she grew impatient with how long was taking and to speed things up, took a candle and heated the cocoon, albeit very gently. The experiment worked but it was a mistake in the long run. The butterfly emerged more quickly, however because of adding heat violated something within the natural process, the butterfly was burned with wings weak to fly”.

Haste and pre-maturity had stunted growth and deformed a natural process, some things can’t be rushed. The Xmas gift had been opened early, the bride had been slept with before the wedding; a process that needed allotted period of time, had been short circuited. There hadn’t been enough advent.

Advent means waiting. Among other things, it celebrates the idea that the messiah must be born from a virgin, why? Is sex something unworthy of God? If Jesus was born in the natural way, would that some how given him less dignity? This is the underside in some spirituality, but Jesus’ birth from virgin has nothing to do with that. Jesus was born of the virgin Mary to underscore the fact that he had no human father and also to teach an important truth, namely; that in order for something sublime, to be born there must first be proper time for waiting, a season of Advent. Why? The answer lies properly understanding chastity, chastity is not first of all something to do with sex. Chastity is something to do with how we experience reality in general.... all experiences. To be chaste is to have proper reverence towards ourselves, towards reality in general and towards sex.

Lack of chastity is irreverence, in any area of life, sex included. Reverence is all about awaiting, proper awaiting. We can see this by looking at its opposite. Lack of chastity is to be irreverent, it is to be impatient, selfish, callous, immature, indiscipline, boorish in a way so that our actions deprive someone else of his or her full uniqueness, dignity and preciousness. And we do this every time we short-circuit waiting. Sex because it is so deeply affects the soul, speaks most loudly about or lack of it. Sex is only chaste when it’s not short-circuited by impatience, selfishness, or lack of respect. Sadly because sex is so powerful, these things are short circuited. We violate chastity in sex whenever there is pre-maturity, unfair pressure, crass force, talking without giving posturing an intimacy. We don’t mean lack of respect for previous commitments, disregard for wider relationship of family and community or failure to respect long range happiness and health.

There is a fault in our chastity when we put a candle to the cocoon so as to unnaturally rush the process. Chastity is about proper waiting and waiting is about patience in carrying the tensions and frustrations. We suffer as we live unfinished symphony that constitutes our lives.

God is never in a hurry! Every tear brings the messiah closer! It is with much groaning of the flesh that life of the spirit is brought forth. A feast can only be a feast, only after there has been some fasting. Love can only be a gift if the gift is fully respected; and we must learn to wait for God, for love, for the bride and for Christmas.


Nothing in life is to be feared. It is only to be understood

- Marrie Currie-

Rev. Fr. Joseph Nyamunga Mubiru, SSA
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